Its going to be one of those days

Its Saturday morning, so am off this weekend, and I am feeling mixed emotions already. For the last few weeks people keep asking me "are you OK?" , and I say yes, in my usual logical way. But deep down inside I have been using my intellect to cancel out my anger.  Eventually it will have to come to the surface. It sneaks up on you in your dreams, then sets your mood for the day. Such powerful emotions are hard to shake off, this week I had to attend the emergency dentist as a fragment was causing me intense pain, then I had to take mum down to the Hospital with the very real threat of Cancer in the equation.all of this reminds me how human we are. Its like it was once before, the house is suddenly so quiet, no longer the sound of the boys or the sight of Katie's smile and touch..Don't get me wrong, I know Katie has let me and others down massive,  I suspect she does not realise the pain of  taking away a family that you have adopted and love is so intense. So I have inherited the silence of a family home.
                                                                  So now what, am I to spend my life tending the garden and polishing my MG?. Or I could go to the pub on my own, as I do the shopping. Then I look at the laundry and the ironing, its got to be done. Boring!, to hell with this, will have to get out there and find somebody really special.... Nil Desperandum!